BUFFY, THE VAMPIRE SLAYER AND THE HOLY GRAIL
Lady Buffy, the Vampire Slayer, along with Xander, King of the
Cretins and his Knights of the Library Table, is on a quest
to find the Holy Grail before The Master’s evil minions.
The Grail holds the power of life and can bring The Master back
from the dead. Only she can stop them. _________________________________________________________________
First, let us meet our crusaders:
Lady Buffy, the Vampire Slayer: One girl in every blah blah
blah.
Xander, King of the Cretins: Leader of the Knights of the Library
Table.
Sir Giles, the Wise: Buffy’s mentor and trainer.
Lady Willow, the Pure: A genius with an abacus. (This is 932
AD.)
Sir Angel, the Undead: Sufferer of Lancelot/Guinnevere syndrome.
Lady Cordelia, the Self Involved: Protector of the wardrobe.
Sir Lancelot, the Brave: Xander’s strongest knight, with his page, Patsy
Sir Robin, the Not so brave: The man with the Mintrels.
Brother Maynard: Keeper of the holy stuff and Sir Giles’ books..
And finally, the well named Sir Not Appearing in this Crossover.
And now for our story:
____________________________________________
Lady Buffy, the Vampire Slayer: "Giles, where should we look first?"
Sir Giles, the Wise: "According to my books, there should be a castle ahead which holds the Grail."
Lady Willow, the Pure: "Uh, is that it over there?"
Lady Buffy: "Talk about your fixer-upers."
Sir Robin, the Not so Brave: "Looks like no one is there. Why don’t we go?"
Sir Giles: "We must find the Grail, or the Master will be loosed upon the world. We must see where it was taken."
Sir Lancelot, the Brave: "I’ll lead the charge. Lady Buffy, you and I will charge the front gate with King Xander.
Sir Giles, you, Sir Angel and Sir Robin, go around back."
Sir Robin: "I think I should stay behind to protect the Ladies and my Mintrels."
Sir Lancelot: "Chaarge!"
Off he races to the front gate, sword in hand screaming. Everyone
else, caught off guard, quickly follow. Alas, the door is locked.
King Xander: "At least they could’ve had a door bell!"
Sir Lancelot: "I’ll break it down." Nothing happens.
From above, in a French accent: "Who’s down there?"
Sir Giles: "Hello. I’m am Sir Giles, Knight of the Library Table. I am looking for the Holy Grail. Have you seen
it?"
The guard: "I don’t know what you are talking about. Go away!"
Sir Giles: "The Grail was once housed in this castle. Do you know where it is?"
Lady Cordelia, the Self Involved: "Who is this loser?"
The guard: "We’ve already got one!"
Lady Willow: "So much for the Master’s plan."
King Xander: "Alright, let’s get it and book, I’m starving."
Sir Robin: "Yes, let’s go away."
Sir Giles: "Did you just say you have the Grail."
The guard: "That’s what I said. Now go away you silly English Kaniggit!"
The guard: "I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hampster and your father smelled of eldeberries. Go away,
or I shall taunt you a second time."
Sir Giles loses his temper and attacks the castle with Lancelot.
Suddenly, animals start flying over the side of the castle.
Lady Willow: "Ooh look, a duck."
As the rain of pets continues King Xander yells: "Run away! Run away!"
One final animal, a cow, is thrown over the wall landing on Lady Cordelia’s boyfriend, killing him and destroying
half her wardrobe.
Lady Cordelia: "No! Not my shoes!"
______________________________________________________________
Will they devise a plan to sack the castle? Or will they cower
in fear of flying cows? Find out next time. Same Buffy Board, Different Buffy Time.
